Are we equally yoked ?
Category : Marriage Advice Thoughts
In several sessions recently the discussion of being unequally yoked has come up. It is also something I see increasingly more frequent on the Christian dating sites.
Biblically, the concept of being equally yoked in marriage is never referenced. When Paul talks about being equally yoke in 2 Corinthians 6:14, his reference is all relationships a Christian should have, not just marriage.
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 2 Cor 6:14 NIV
But if we wanted to apply this concept to a marriage relationship of two Christians, what might it look like?
The interesting thing I believe we forget is the very specific purpose of a yoke. And Jesus, as a carpenter, would very specifically understand its purpose. No two oxen are alike. They are different in strength, stature, and their abilities to perform their specific tasks. When Jesus says, “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” in Matthew 11:30, He is saying that when we share our burdens with Him, our journey becomes manageable. ( – The Greek word used for easy is actually Chrestos, which when properly translated means well fitted, not easy ).
So the yokes purpose is to balance the differences between a couple. It is not that they will be in sync all the time, or agree on everything. It is an example of Gods design that a husband and wife complement each other. The strengths and weaknesses will balance each other out as they continue to seek the Lords guidance in His marriage covenant.
Historically, a yoke was often adjusted over time, refitted and fine-tuned. The same would hold true with your marriage. It is unlikely that each spouse will spiritually mature at exactly the same rate. So, we cannot believe that Gods design is that if one of the spouses grows closer to Him faster, that He would find the couple unequally yoked. It would be the responsibility of the more mature party to be an example of Christ like love and bear the extra burden of the yoke until the other party came along side.